I have moments when I think I’m some kind of superhero. I feel empowered by some idea, or I just have a lot to do and am determined to do ALL. OF. IT. I also have this tendency to expect perfection of myself. Not that I just WANT things to be perfect, or to complete my whole to do list, or be on time for everything. I EXPECT that I will be, and beat myself up when I fail.
I also have some days when I just feel negative. It might be a hormonal imbalance, or sleep deprivation, or extra challenging kids. I know we all have something that makes some days almost unbearable.
My Easter weekend was like this, for 4 days straight. It was not stress over anything in particular. But as the weekend wore on, I thought about how I try to read my kids’ needs and how I accommodate them. I decided I really needed to do the same for myself.
If you think about a sick child, or a kid who has autism, or anxiety, and they are having a rather tough day, you relax the expectations a little, not push harder. Some days they need a little extra love, and a few less requirements. And I needed to do that for myself. Not an easy task, since I expect such unattainable things on a regular basis. But I tried to go through Sunday and Monday with that in mind - that I was having a rough weekend emotionally, and I needed to expect a little less perfection. My work only got partially done. Some household chores didn’t get finished either. And I just let a few things slide that normally I would have stressed about.
And it worked. By allowing myself a little leeway, I was able to not get overwhelmed and angry with myself for not doing everything and being perfect. That would have been a huge trigger and would have just added to my already heightened emotional state.
Now I just need to work on not expecting perfection and superpowers EVER.
The takeaway though, is just remember you (as a mom or dad, as an entrepreneur, as a human) deserve accommodations to meet your needs. Those change from day to day. So allow yourself to be an imperfect human, and expect a little less sometimes.
I also have some days when I just feel negative. It might be a hormonal imbalance, or sleep deprivation, or extra challenging kids. I know we all have something that makes some days almost unbearable.
My Easter weekend was like this, for 4 days straight. It was not stress over anything in particular. But as the weekend wore on, I thought about how I try to read my kids’ needs and how I accommodate them. I decided I really needed to do the same for myself.
If you think about a sick child, or a kid who has autism, or anxiety, and they are having a rather tough day, you relax the expectations a little, not push harder. Some days they need a little extra love, and a few less requirements. And I needed to do that for myself. Not an easy task, since I expect such unattainable things on a regular basis. But I tried to go through Sunday and Monday with that in mind - that I was having a rough weekend emotionally, and I needed to expect a little less perfection. My work only got partially done. Some household chores didn’t get finished either. And I just let a few things slide that normally I would have stressed about.
And it worked. By allowing myself a little leeway, I was able to not get overwhelmed and angry with myself for not doing everything and being perfect. That would have been a huge trigger and would have just added to my already heightened emotional state.
Now I just need to work on not expecting perfection and superpowers EVER.
The takeaway though, is just remember you (as a mom or dad, as an entrepreneur, as a human) deserve accommodations to meet your needs. Those change from day to day. So allow yourself to be an imperfect human, and expect a little less sometimes.